Going to the gym is part of gay culture. But when you have kids it’s harder to make time for it. We brought in personal trainer and gay dad Chris Tye-Walker to help you bring back the motivation to lose that dad bod and get back into your sexy, muscular, DILF shape.

It may be a little stereotypical, but most gay men make it their business to go to the gym. And when you become a father, the commitment to your body is just one of a long list of commitments. The goal of this episode of Daddy Squared: The Gay Dads Podcast is to help you with this commitment. “Having kids is super restrictive on all schedules,” explains our guest in this episode, personal trainer Chris Tye-Walker. “You lose any alone time, you lose time with your spouse to go and enjoy each other. Before I had kids no one told me that the last thing you’re going to have is time and freedom. Well, maybe they told me, but I didn’t hear them!” 

“So when it comes to working out when you have kids, you can use your kids for your workouts, you can do your weights at home to still be active and [make your workouts a time that you are] playing with your children.”

An ideal number of workout per week is five, “but that’s not always realistic,” Chris says. “I would prefer you’d do 30 minutes a day. And here’s the thing: we all get tired when the kids go to bed at 7-7:30 and it’s always a choice. If you want to work out when the kids go to bed you totally can. It’s hard, you want to sit on the couch, you want to eat you want to have a cocktail and do nothing. If you want to focus on fitness you can get up and jump rope for 15 minutes or do a circuit for 30 minutes – if that’s the time you have.”

“If you’re just going to do cardio, you can do it first thing in the morning. If you do a session with cardio and weights – do your weights first, because you’re going to be strongest and freshest when you start your workout.”

We also discussed body shame and that feeling some gay men have at the gym, and you look around you and see the hot, muscular guys around you. Chris recommends to stop comparing yourself to them, and to remember that they were once too where you are now.

“Everyone suffers from body dysmorphia,” he explains. “I have it too, and no matter what you’re going to feel like ‘I don’t look good today’, ’I don’t feel good about myself.’ Someone who’s out of shape, or coming back from having newborns, or being injured or wherever else is always going to be very daunting coming back to the gym where everyone is younger or ripped. So, here’s the really hard part for everyone: no one gives a f***.” 

“Everyone is so narcissistic in a gym, all they care about is themselves. No one is really looking. They’re on their treadmill, doing their own thing. Yes, people look, but you have to remember that everyone’s there for themselves, everyone’s there to prove themselves, everyone’s there to work hard, no one’s there to make fun of you for looking a certain way. Everyone in the gym is going to better themselves. Everyone’s been in the place where they’re not happy with how they look, even if it’s the person in the best shape in that gym – they had to work to get there, at some point they didn’t feel they’re in the shape they want to get into, so they went to the gym.”

Our Guest: Chris Tye Walker

Chris Tye-Walker (CSCS) is a Certified Fitness Trainer, and one of the most sought after celebrity Elite Performance Coach in Los Angeles. He is the host and creator of TheTreadSeries.com, a lululemon ambassador, and he has appeared as a Fitness Trainer / Host on Bodyrock.TV, SELF Magazine’s 5 Ways To, BeFit’s Transform workout series, and a variety of online, live and televised fitness programs. Originally from London, England, Chris has extensive fitness training and experience stemming from his own prolific career as a nationally ranked athlete. He ran Track & Field for Great Britain and was from 2002-2005.

The discipline, passion for fitness, education and expertise that Chris acquired during his own athletic career, combined with his love for working with people, propelled him into a career as a fitness trainer and has made him an international success. He is favorite among the who’s-who of Hollywood.

In addition to being a Certified Strength & Conditioning Specialist, Chris has a Bachelors Degree in Sports Science (with a concentration in Sports Psychology). His fitness resume includes being a Guest Fitness Instructor for the NIKE Women’s NTC Tour and working for the UCLA Department of Athletics.

Download Chris’ List of Basic Moves

When you’re stuck in your workout – fall back to one of these basic moves that fits with the program of the day. Sign up to Daddy Squared community and receive Chris Tye-Walker’s cheat sheet of to your email:

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Men Having Babies Corner

International nonprofit organization Men Having Babies helps gay men who want to become fathers through surrogacy to realize their dream of fatherhood. The organization helps with education and financial assistance, and holds conferences across the globe that are dubbed ‘surrogacy bootcamp’ and help gay men navigate through the sea of information on surrogacy. In this episode, Sara Miller, a former surrogate and member of MHB’s staff, explains how to choose your surrogacy agency and clinic.
Surrogacy Directory – Ratings and Reviews

Episode Credits

Co-Hosts: Yan Dekel, Alex Maghen
Guest: Chris Tye-Walker
Opening Theme: Hercules & Love Affair, “Leonora” buy here
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